We begin this week's episode right where we left off - Agnes getting killed by Tomasyn. Dominic and Shelby freak out. Dominic expresses that he did not sign up for this and he wants out.
Shelby, on the other hand, knows that nobody is coming and tells him as much. They discuss what they are going to do and Shelby remembers the tunnel. They rush downstairs and Shelby has a minor freak out about going past Matt's body. Dominic talks her through it and they enter the tunnel. They immediately see something in the distance and Shelby hopes it is Edward as he is kind of helpful. Instead it is the Chens (the poor family who was killed at the house) and they chase Shelby and Dominic out of the tunnel.
Back at the Polk farm, Momma Polk is giving a lesson on what makes a good knife for cutting thin slices (because that's not creepy). Momma Polk gives Jether the knife and tells him to cut her a nice piece of Lee (*shudder*). Lee, naturally, tries to reason with them. She expresses that you're not supposed to eat people. The Polks have a motto though - 'If ya ain’t Polk, ya ain’t people' - which totally explains why they are okay with eating people. Turns out cannibalism has run in their family since the Great Depression. Their family decided to eat some people who stole from them and it was passed down from generation to generation. Lee is quick to point out that once the police catch them the whole Polk family will be killed since the state has the death penalty. Momma Polk just laughs and says that they have been paying off the police for years. Where exactly are you getting the money for this? Because if you can afford to pay off police I am pretty sure you can afford actual food.
Jether starts to cut Lee's thigh and she passes out. When she comes to she is missing a not only a piece of her thigh but also an ear. The ear is to be a Christmas present. The Polks have a tradition where they each get a pickled ear, a bag of mentho-lyptus, a jar of blackstrap molasses, more ammo, and cuddles with Momma (the babies anyway, the older Polk men share her bed in a different way) for Christmas. Jether explains he is too old for cuddles, but he's still 'too young' for the other kind of cuddles. So much is wrong with all of this. I do not want this kind of Christmas. DO NOT WANT.
Jether and Lee talk about Flora. He asks Lee if she loves her daughter to which Lee replies that of course she does. Jether isn't happy with his own Momma right now because he wanted to be on TV and it sounds like be blames her for him not being part of the original show. The whines that the others got to be 'in the story'. Lee inquires how they knew about the show to which Jether hilariously replies "We're part of the United States, we get TV". Lee tells him all about the new show and promises him that if he helps her, she'll make sure he gets on TV. He can be the hero. He can even be bigger than Pigman. This enrages Jether. He claims nobody could be bigger than Pigman.
I just want to take a moment to confirm that Finn Wittrock is playing Jether. Props to the makeup department and to Finn for disappearing into the role because apparently people are still confused about who he is playing. The trade off of Finn Wittrock's gorgeous face being covered by all that prosthetic is that he is able to flex his acting muscle instead of just being the pretty guy. I am immediately reminded of what was so captivating and dizzying about his performance as Dandy Mott. The guy is crazy talented. Anyways, totally Finn ... even if it doesn't look exactly like him.
He leaves in his rage, only to come back and offer Lee cocaine. Hold up .. the Polks can afford to both pay off the cops and have a supply of cocaine? Sure. Lets go with that. Anyways, Lee resists at first but finally gives in because she figures she is going to die at the end of all this. She inquires why they don't just kill her, instead of torturing her by taking her meat piece by piece. Jether tells her that it is mainly for tradition. Their ancestors didn't have iceboxes so it helped keep the meat from spoiling but also they like the taste that the adrenaline and fear gives the meat.
Dominic and Shelby are chased by the Chens through the house. Dominic, helpfully, slams his hand in a door in their haste. As Dominic is grabbing ice and bemoaning all this 'paranormal activity shit' Shelby is losing it. She is ready to give up. She doesn't think they'll survive. She had Matt last time and doesn't think she can make it without him. You're the one who killed him, Shelby! Dominic gives her a pep talk and Shelby doesn't believe him but she rallies. They are about to attempt to escape again when the Pigman attacks. They go to run back upstairs when the chandelier falls on Shelby's foot ensuring Dominic has to help her up. They are basically being terrorized by all of the ghosts/creatures/whatever as they flee. They barricade themselves back in the bathroom where they started out from which Shelby finds hilarious. Shelby is obviously not doing well and the fact that she's killed Matt has definitely caught up to her. All of the sadness, and guilt is pressing down on her, so she decides to kill herself. This means both of the first two characters we were introduced to are dead. There will be no happy ending for Shelby or Matt.
Lee has now had part of her shoulder taken. She asks Jether to go into her pocket to get a picture of Flora for her. Jether, it would appear, likes touching Lee quite a bit. Lee wants to leave a video message for Flora so Jether records for her but only after he covers up the bloody parts so Flora won't see them. She admits that she killed Mason and that she did it alone because he was trying to take Flora from her. She tells Flora that she hopes she can go on without the weight of lies and doubt. Congratulations, Sidney. You indirectly got Lee to admit the truth. Jether admits to Lee that he has not killed anyone. Lee is supposed to be his first time. He admits that he doesn't want to hurt her though because he likes her. Lee, suddenly remembering she was a cop previously, uses this to her advantage. She tells him that she likes him too and proceeds to seduce him. She offers to have sexytimes with him and tells him that she wants to touch him (so he needs to untie her). Jether unties her and Lee immediately attacks. She gets him into a sleeper hold and applies pressure until he's unconscious. She gets up, grabs the knife and stabs him with it just as he is waking up. Goodbye, Jether. My fave lasted two whole episodes.
Meanwhile, Dominic is feeling sorry for himself. All he wanted was his own show, and to go to Thailand (first class, naturally). I really feel for him.
We finally catch up with Audrey and Monet who are spending quality time with Momma and Lot Polk. Lot isn't happy that they mocked their family in TV show, or that their babies were taken away. Audrey points out that it was Matt and Shelby who caused that to happen, not her and Monet. They are just actors. Monet offers to take them back to the house so they can get Matt and Shelby. The Polks decline because of the blood moon. It turns out that the Polks also collect teeth and Shelby and Monet just happen to have a mouth full of them. They first attempt to take one from Monet but the pliers break (along with the chair). Momma and Lot go to get new pliers and supplies and leave Cain (their other son) in charge.As soon as they leave Monet attacks and attempts to free Audrey but can't so she takes off promising to get help. Momma is not happy to learn Monet got free and makes Cain and Lot go after her. Momma proceeds to pull some teeth out of Audrey's mouth in the meantime. It is very brutal to watch.
Lee proves she's not an awful person by coming to free Audrey and Monet. She attacks Momma and frees Audrey. Audrey finishes the job and kills Momma by bashing her over the head repeatedly with the pliers used to take out her teeth. They take off and run BACK TO THE HOUSE! What?! Why would you not just leave? I don't understand. I get they are injured but LEAVE WHILE YOU CAN.
Lee finds Matt's body and is distraught. Audrey has to talk her into moving because whatever killed Matt could still be in the house. Can there be two survivors because these two are amazing together. They really are. Audrey helps Lee up the stairs. They set up camp in the room Audrey was staying in. She goes to get some water so they can take some of the pain meds she has in her suitcase. She finds Shelby's body and in typical Audrey fashion makes it all about her.
Audrey, it's not about you! Dominic, who is still there, explains that Shelby killed herself, and that she killed Matt when he's questioned about it. Neither Audrey or Lee is buying it though, especially since Dominic has the knife in his hand. Lee says that Shelby loved Matt. He's the reason she came back to the house so why would she kill him (which, fair point). Dominic mentions that Shelby lost it when she saw Matt sleeping with Scathach again. Audrey is still not buying it. She says there is no way that Shelby would have killed herself (in typical Audrey fashion).
I love that Audrey is used for humour. It breaks things up nicely and helps ease a bit of the tension for a breather between the insane moments.
Dominic pleads for them to stay together but the ladies push him out into the hall and close the door. Dominic is immediately attacked by the Pigman and killed while Audrey tearfully records a goodbye message to her 'fans' in case she is killed.
Morning arrives and Audrey and Lee are happy to have survived the night. Instead of getting out of town immediately, Lee wants to go back to the Polk farm. Audrey asks if she's crazy (which is a completely valid question). Lee reminds Audrey that there is video of them killing people and she wants it back so it doesn't fall into the wrong hands and they are made to look like murders. In reality Lee just wants to get her confession about Mason back.
As they head out the door they are greeted by by the Pigman. Audrey starts beating him and the Pigman yells at them to stop. He removes the pig head to reveal ... Wes Bently (aka the guy who played Ambrose in the reenactments). Audrey calls him Dylan. My guess? Sidney hired him to show up a few days into shooting to scare the people in the house.
Our group now consists of Audrey, Lee, and maybe Monet. When we last saw Monet she was running through the woods being chased by Lot and Cain so I assume she's alive for now. Obviously, Dylan is now included in the group. My money for last person standing at this point? Lee. She's resourceful and a former cop. I think she'll make it out but she might be in jail for murdering Mason. I feel pretty confident in saying that nobody is going to get a happy ending.
Until next week ....
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