Once Upon A Time - The Jolly Rodger

We start out this episode with Hook and his band of pirates being, well, pirates. Pretty sure this is the lost year. They steal a carriage and find some jewels. Their reward - a night of drinking, of course. This is the Hook I LIKED! A dastardly, dashing scoundrel.

Hook's men have purchased him a prostitute. As he walks with her outside, he pays her and tells her that in the morning she'll tell his men she had a grand time. She kind of resembles Milah a bit. Nice of him though. As Hook is walking away, someone attacks him. It's Ariel!! He is confused, as he has no clue who she is. She tells him that she knows exactly who HE is and that he is going to pay for what he's done (all while holding a knife to his throat). I would have thought that Hook would have met her when they all came back from Neverland at the dock. Didn't he?

Storybrooke - Present

Emma and Charming are putting together a baby crib. So adorable, because they are clueless. Snow is concerned that they should be focusing on finding Zelena and Rumple whom they have not seen since the showdown. Charming says that the crib is a statement. They are not going to let Zelena get the baby. Regina enters and says that she put a protection spell in place that cannot be undone by blood magic. Snow ponders why Zelena would want her baby, and Regina tells her that there are plenty of spells that require baby parts (EWWW). Emma is done waiting around. She wants to play defense. Regina scoffs that she barely outwitted the witch. She says that Zelena has powerful magic. Emma wants Regina to teach her how to control her magic. Regina agrees but only if they do it HER way. She wants Emma to fully commit to it. Emma agrees. I think it's well past time that Emma learned more about her magic. Emma immediately tells Charming and Snow that she'll be careful and they offer to watch Henry. Emma tells them that Henry wants to hang out with people who are more fun. Namely Hook. Henry likes Hook is basically what they are saying. Sigh.

At the docks Smee confronts Hook. Wants to know why they are not banding together and basically being pirates again. Hook reminds them that they cannot leave Storybrooke without becoming monkeys (which fair point. Hook is totally right). Smee wants to know where the Jolly Rodger is. Hook tells him that it is not here. Hook tells Smee that he has no intention of leaving Storybrooke. Smee wants to know WHY Hook wants to stay. Hook snarks back and Smee takes off as Emma and Henry walk up. Emma asks him if he can take care of Henry. Hook replies that if she wanted to get close to him all she had to do was ask. She says she isn't surprised that he's making this all about him. She tells him that she needs him to watch Henry so she can go learn magic from Regina. Also, I know people wont care, but her TRUE LOVE just died pretty much YESTERDAY. Now is not the time for flirting Hook. He tells her that is a reasonable plan, and that it's about time she embraced her magic. She says she is not embracing anything. After she defeats the witch she's done. Heading back to New York with Henry. Hook tells her that she can't pretend this never happened. Hook says he tried to return to his old life and it didn't work. Emma wants to know what he's hiding, what happened in the last year. He says she can't return to her old life, no matter how much she wants to. I agree that Henry deserves to know. He has family that loves him.

Charming and Snow want to show Henry that they are just as much fun as Hook. Awww, those poor Charmings. They want to be the cool Grandma and Grandpa again. As they are walking along the beach they hear a commotion. It's Ariel who has just washed ashore and a bunch of people are there to help her. Snow wants to know where she's been. Ariel says she has been under the sea searching for Prince Eric. She says that she couldn't find him after the second curse. I hope Eric is okay. Poor Ariel. Charming says they don't know anything because of the memory loss, but Hook might know something. Ariel seems reluctant, and unsure if he'd help. Snow says that he helped them get back Henry, so she thinks he would.

 Enchanted Forest - Missing Year

Hook wants to know why Ariel has the knife to his throat. She tells him that she know he kidnapped Prince Eric and she wants him returned to her. I have a bad feeling about this. Hook admits it sounds like something he would do, but she has the wrong pirate. He grabs the knife and puts it to her throat. She tells him that one of Eric's men escaped, and told her that it was Hook's ship that took Eric - The Jolly Rodger. This gets Hook's attention. He questions Ariel about what she knows (while still holding the dagger to her throat) and she says that all she knows is the dagger he has against her throat came from the ship. Hook removes the dagger to look at the handle, and sees two entwined letter Bs on the it (so we're going to meet Blackbeard right?). Hook runs to tell his crew about the Jolly Rodger's fate. He wants to take it back, obviously. Smee wants to know whose funeral they will be attending, and Hook tells him Blackbeard. Smee says Blackbeard is the most cutthroat pirate to ever set sail. He seems scared. Hook doesn't care. He wants his ship back. He hasn't been himself since he got back, and it's because he doesn't have 'her'. Smee says that he's talking about the ship like it's a woman. Hook says that women come and go, but a pirate's life is forever. Ariel walks in as they are discussing this, and says that she wants Eric back, so she's going too. Hook tells her that few people put a dagger to his throat and live to tell the tale, so she should leave before changes his mind (threatening women again, excellent). She tells him no, that she's going. She brings up the pirate code. Says that since she gave him information, he has to repay her in equal favour. Ariel's so smart! Love her.

Storybrooke - Present

Hook and Henry are playing some sort of dice game at Granny's. Charming comes in and Hook leaves Henry at the table to go talk to him. They introduce him to Ariel (so she can't remember any of the time she interacted with Hook? Hmmm... and yet she knew there was a missing year) and she asks him if he's seen Eric. Mentions that Eric loved to sail and was from the Maritime Kingdom. Hook looks a little sad and hesitates before saying he's never heard of Eric. I think something bad happened to Eric.

Regina brings Emma to her vault thing. Tells her not to touch anything. She wants to teach Emma a foundation first, and build from there in terms of teaching her magic. Sounds like a solid plan. Regina want to know who is watching Henry (she assumes the 'Uncharmings' are). Emma tells her that Hook is. Regina does not look happy. Emma says that Henry likes him. Regina says Hook is impulsive, violent, and has a hook for a hand, of course a 12 year old boy likes him. Emma says she trusts Hook because he brought her back to Storybrooke. Regina is like "of course he brought YOU back" and Emma is like "what does that mean?" and Regina basically says that everyone sees the yearning looks and doe eyes they give each other. Emma says she doesn't yearn. Regina allows that maybe SHE doesn't but Hook does. I need ALL the wine.

Regina is showing Emma a book of spells. They discuss Rumple's teaching techniques. Regina basically tells Emma that Rumple was a tough teacher. If he tried to teach you to swim and you didn't learn, you ended up drowning. It gives Regina an idea, and she magics them to a bridge that doesn't look stable.

Back with the Charmings/Ariel/Hook/ they are discussing how to find Eric. They decide to check Rumple's shop to see if there is something that belongs to Eric there so they can use a locator spell to find him. Hook wishes them luck, but Snow says Hook should go. He remembers more, and her and Charming can watch Henry. Hook pulls Charming aside. He tells Charming it's a bad idea. He thinks Ariel's Prince might be dead (I think Hook knows he is dead) and that they shouldn't give her false hope. Charming says there is no such thing as false hope, and tells Hook to go with Ariel.

 Enchanted Forest - Missing Year

Ariel doesn't like land travel. Totally adorable. Hook agrees with her. Her cloak gets stuck, and Hook tears it which makes Ariel upset. He tells her that mending a cloak should be the least of her worries. She might not find Eric, or survive herself. She says she will. He reminds her that Blackbeard is a fearsome pirate and she should prepare for the worst. He insinuates that he would kill Eric if he had him (as that's what pirates do). She says that she is surprised to hear that Hook would kill Eric if he had him. She's heard stories from people who think that he's a hero for reuniting Snow White with her family. Hook tells her not to believe every story she hears. She tells him that being good is not a bad thing. He tells her that he is a pirate, always will be. End of story. I basically can't even right now.

Storybrooke - Present

Ariel and Belle are reunited. So adorable. Both ladies are beautiful, and lovely. They ask her if she's found anything of Eric's. Belle says she hasn't, but she'll help look (of course she will, because Belle is awesome). Hook goes to search and finds his telescope (is that what they are called?). He uses it to look around the shop and sees the symbol for Ursula. Turns out it's attached to Eric's cloak. Ariel is happy, but Hook looks sad. I think something awful happened, and Ariel is going to be crushed. Ariel gives Hook a hug for finding it.

Back on the bridge.. Regina tells Emma that since her power comes out when she's pushed by her instincts, they are going to use it. She starts removing boards from the bridge, until Emma is barely hanging on. She urges Emma to save the bridge, save herself. She falls, but ends up come back by causing the bridge to float. It's a kick ass scene. Regina tells Emma that she is mad that Emma has wasted her potential.

Back in Gold's shop, Belle is sprinkling Eric's cloak with a locator spell so that it'll return to it's owner. Ariel thanks her for everything (because Belle is busy trying to find a way to release Rumple). The cloak takes off out of the shop with them quickly following.

 Enchanted Forest - Missing Year

They found the Jolly Rodger. Hook mentions the ship is beautiful, and soon it'll be back in his loving arms. Ariel is like 'you're talking about a boat like it's a woman'. Smee just wants to know what the plan is. Hook's plan is to simply walk up and announce himself it appears. Total pirate move, but not the brightest. He calls out Blackbeard, who looks awesome. He actually looks like Disney's version of Hook. Hook and Blackbeard sword fight. This is all very much what I expected when Hook joined the show. Lots of awesome pirate shenanigans. They've been missing. Hook wins by tricking him with a loose floorboard. He is about to kill Blackbeard before Ariel rushes over, and wants him to find out where Eric is first. Blackbeard laughs and says that the rumours are true. Hook's gone soft. Hook gets Blackbeard to finally tell where Eric is though - a deserted island that only he knows the location of. Blackbeard was going to use Eric for ransom. Ariel offers to pay whatever it is. Turns out what Blackbeard wants is to prove that Hook is not a pirate anymore (at least that is what he wants now). He offers to give the location of Eric in exchange for the Jolly Rodger. I wonder what Hook decided.

Storybrooke - Present

The cloak leads them to the water. It goes under the sea. Ariel realizes that this means Eric is gone and starts to cry. She hugs Hook again, and he tells her that he is sorry. Did he not give up the Jolly Rodger? If not, where is it? Is it too much to hope that Eric was turned into a merman?!

Snow and Charming are going to teach Henry to drive a car?! Funny, but it just feels weird. Henry is not a good driver. He ends up hitting a mailbox and almost causing an accident.

Ariel is very sad. She thanks Hook for giving her closure. She knows their story is over, she just wants to know how it ended. Ariel tells him that he is more than a pirate, that he has a true heart (OMFG. I CAN NOT). If he ended up getting Eric killed, he's a jerk not to tell her what happened.

 Enchanted Forest - Missing Year

Ariel is basically pleading with Hook to help her. She beseeches him to do the right thing. She asks him if true love is worth more than the ship. Hook basically says love is nothing but pain, and that he's doing Ariel a favour. All he needs is his ship. Hook pushes Blackbeard off the plank as Ariel screams no. Hook announces that everyone who swears an oath to the new captain will be given quarter, anyone who doesn't can walk the plank. Ariel smacks him across the face, and says she was wrong. That he is heartless. She tells him he'll never be happy because of it. She dives into the water telling him that Eric is still out there, and she's going to find him. *sniff* I wonder what happened, and where he is now.

Storybrooke - Present

Ariel is walking the docks by herself when Hook calls her. Tells her that he hasn't been truthful. He fills her in on the stuff that happened in the missing year. He apologizes and tells her that he sacrificed her saving Eric for his ship. She smacks him and calls him a coward, and a monster. "You let a man die for your ship!". He tells her that he was empty, and that he thought the ship could fill the void in his broken heart (obviously about Emma *rolls eyes*). Ariel is pissed still. Hook says he would give anything to take it back, make it right. Ariel says she doesn't trust a man that doesn't believe in love. He says that he does. She wants him to swear on it. She asks him if he still loves this girl. He says yes. She wants him to swear to it on her name. He swears it on Emma's name (NEAL DIED ONE DAY AGO! SERIOUSLY WRITERS?! CAN YOU WAIT BEFORE YOU DO THIS?!). Ariel reveals herself to be the witch in disguise. She blows some green magic at Hook, and gets rid of the disguise. She tells Hook that Ariel did in fact find Eric after all (oh, yay! I am happy for Eric and Ariel). He wants to know how she knows this. She says she has spies in all the realms. She says that Ariel and her prince have been living happily ever after on some island. She tells him that she knew she could use the guilt he felt about that decision to her advantage. She cursed Hook so that next time he kisses Emma it will steal her magic. He will steal everything that makes Emma special, magical, and everything that makes her a threat. He says that he will tell Emma what happened. She says that she'll send the Dark One to kill Emma before he can tell her. He thinks that if Zelena could have killed Emma, she would have already. That's why she sent the monkey to watch over Emma. She shrugs that it no longer matters, he is going to remove her magic. She says that she can always hurt those Emma cares about - her parents, friends, Henry. Hook tells her to stay away from Henry. She laughs that he's become quite fond of the boy. She basically gives him an ultimatum of kissing Emma, or everyone Emma loves will die.

Hook goes to speak with the Charmings. Emma answers the door. She wants to know where Henry is. He mentions he's with Snow and Charming. Her and Regina want to know what he was doing all day in that case. He tells them that he was helping Ariel find her Prince. Regina seems surprised Ariel was there. Hook mentions the spell worked on the cloak, and Ariel swam off to find Eric. He says that Ariel asked him to say goodbye to Snow. So he's not even going to tell Emma? Sigh. Regina wants to find out if Ariel is on the island. She wants Emma to use magic to take a peek at them. Hook says it's bad form to spy on such a private moment as their reunion, but Emma is like 'let's do it'. I think Emma likes magic. I think Regina knows something is up. Regina helps Emma tap into the magic and they see Eric twirling Ariel around on the beach (just like Hook said). Emma gets wide eyed and is all "You did this? You brought them together?" Sigh... NO HE DID NOT! HE SOLD HER OUT AND IS LYING TO YOU. I would be happy because, hello pirate, but he is not doing it for that reason. He tells Emma that it was actually Ariel. She never stopped believing. Emma tells Hook that he's full of surprises.

Henry and the Charmings come back. Henry is excited that he got to drive. Regina is less than thrilled. She hides it by saying it's because she's the mayor and can't have underage (and unlicensed) drivers on the road. Emma says someone could have been hurt. Henry says it was fun, and Charming seems proud of himself. Emma relents and gives Charming a little smile. All Charming wants is to be cool Grandpa again.

Snow asks about Ariel. Hook says she went off to find Eric when they found out where he was. Emma confirms (they checked in via Skype...for Henry's benefit). They are going to have dinner at Granny's and Emma invites Hook. Tells him that whatever happened in the last year, whatever he is not telling her, she doesn't care. She says she is done living in the past (meaning Neal's death is being swept away). He declines and leaves.

Love the ending group shot of Regina, Henry, Emma, and the Charmings having a family dinner. Henry deserves it. All that is missing is Rumple, Belle, and Henry's dad. Hook uses his telescope to look on them, wistfully.

So they are setting up some epic romance thing with Emma and Hook now. Neal's been dead for a day and is basically forgotten. I bet we'll never even hear his name again on the show. My desire to watch season four is quickly dwindling to nothing.

It appears we might get some answers next week about Cora and who Zelena's father is! At least I have that to look forward to.