Sunday, August 22, 2010

Turning 30....and single

When I first decided to start this blog I spent some time looking at other blogs to figure out what I wanted to do and what I wanted my blog to be. This lead to reading some comments and message boards as well.

I stumbled upon a topic in which someone asked why a female celebrity was still single at the age of 30. The exact phrasing was "what is wrong with her that she is still single at her age?". The replies varied from shocked women who didn't think her age was an issue, to people agreeing that there "must be something wrong" for her not to have a man at this stage of her life.

It caused me to reflect on my own situation. I will be turning 30 on April 3, 2011. I am single and definitely won't be married before I turn 30. I started to think about all the various reactions I had read and how I felt about the topic.

I have noticed that ever since I turned 25 people started to comment on the fact I was single. They would ask if I had a boyfriend and when I replied "No" it was usually followed with "why not?". This has gotten worse as I have gotten older. I have even had people ask if I was secretly a lesbian and if that was why I didn't have a boyfriend. The point is people obviously think that if you are single woman after a certain age there has to be a reason.

I find it interesting that older single men are often referred to as "bachelors" or something similar. Women tend to get stuck with much less flattering terms (old maid, anyone?!).

I do think that things are slowly changing though. It is evident by the some of the comments I read. Women are focusing on other things (like careers) before settling down with that special someone. I don't feel that you need to be with someone to be happy. I have great friends, a wonderful family and other things that make me happy on a daily basis. I am not going to say I don't want a man in my life, I think everyone wants love. I just know that I personally don't want to date someone just have to someone there. I would rather not waste another person's time (or my own). This quote from Blake Lively sums it up nicely -
"I don't want to date someone just to date someone. I want to be
with a guy that is going to better my quality of life, better me"
I am sure that people are going to say that I that I am only saying this because I am single. That I am "defensive" and must be upset about it. My whole point with this is that people should be able to do whatever feels right for them....without being judged as a result.

With that said, I end this blog with a question - What do you think? Is 30 the cut off age? Should you start to worry if you're not happily coupled up with someone? I am curious to see what everyone has to say.


  1. Well Dearie, I am in the same boat as you. I feel like I am never gonna get married. But then again, why should I be so hung up on that. :). No, hell no is 30 the cut off date to not get married. We are smart. :).

  2. There is no cut off for anything. You need to do things based on what you feel is right. For some its getting married and having kids at 20 and for others its deciding to enjoy single life.

    And married life can be overrated :) so shake the blues and enjoy ... you only live once (or so i hear)


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